The Task: Watch and write about every movie on my shelf, in order (Blu-rays are sorted after DVDs), by June 10, 2015. Remaining movies: 188 Days to go: 131
Movie #250: Sin City
When Sin City came out, I admit I thought it was fantastic: dark, stylized, poetic. It was literally like a comic book come to life on screen. It’s been probably eight or nine years since I’ve seen it, though, and over that time, without even noticing it or thinking about it at all, my opinion changed. I didn’t even realize it had happened until I saw myself approaching the DVD on my shelf and felt myself fill with dread. If I wasn’t on a deadline and running far behind because of my Christmas acquisitions, I’d have put it off for days and days, there’s not even a question. As I thought about it, remembered the film I saw so many years ago, I realized that while the film is like a comic book come to life, it’s true, it actually doesn’t make any kind of sense. And as I watched it today, I realized how awful and brutal and affected it was.
The movie jumps around from the film noir narration of Detective Hartigan (Bruce Willis), to the rampaging revenge killings of the psychotic Marv (Mickey Rourke) to a murderous band of hookers led by Gail (Rosario Dawson), who looks like she’s part punk, part dominatrix. Jessica Alba is a rodeo stripper named Nancy, Brittany Murphy is a saucy waitress named Shellie, and Josh Hartnett likes to kill beautiful women. Also, Elijah Wood and Nick Stahl both play gross sickos. I’d go into more detail, but the movie doesn’t, really, so why bother? It’s just a jumbled mess.
There are lots of beheadings and ax murders and eviscerations or whatever, and blood looks really weird when it splatters in this weirdly selective color saturation aesthetic they’ve got going, that I’m sure is a product of the original comic. It’s impossibly gory and hard to watch.
However, there are some unintentionally funny parts. One, Nick Offerman has a tiny little role as some kind of heavy, and he sports a bright white buzz cut and goatee. If you recognize him, it’s a great for a chuckle. Two, Marv is unbelievably misogynistic while in the course of avenging a woman, and says all sorts of ridiculous things. First, he calls it ridiculous that Lucille (Carla Gugino) would be “a dyke” because “with a body like that, she could have any many she wanted.” You hear that, lesbians? Why would you want to sleep with women when men are available? Second, he “never hits girls” (unless it’s for her own good, then he’ll knock her completely out so he can torture the guy he captured in peace). I guess the guy has to have some standards?
Needless to say, this is not a movie I’ll be keeping around. The only thing worse than a craptacular film is a craptacular film that’s totally in love with itself. And Sin City is definitely that.
Viable Option 