MY MOVIE SHELF: The Whole Nine Yards

The Task: Watch and write about every movie on my shelf, in order (Blu-rays are sorted after DVDs), by June 10, 2015.  Remaining movies: 134 +2 (Belated Happy Birthday to Me, makes it an even  440 total on the year) = 136 to go Days to go: 93

Movie #304:  The Whole Nine Yards

You know what? I like Matthew Perry. I loved him on Friends. I like his collaborations with Thomas Lennon in 17 Again and The Odd Couple. I really liked his show Go On, even though I was one of maybe 10 who did. I like his silly rom-com with Salma Hayek. I even liked him as arrogant dummy Sandy on Growing Pains, who drank and drove and DIED. And I really, unabashedly, love Matthew Perry in The Whole Nine Yards. I refuse to apologize or be ashamed.

Here he plays “Oz,” short for Nicholas Oseransky, which sounds like a tough guy name but if you’ve ever seen Matthew Perry you know it’s not a tough guy role. It’s not even the incredibly jaded, cynical, sarcastic type of role he sometimes is drawn to. No, Oz is spastic, awkward Matthew Perry, and that’s the most delightful kind. He has no moves, he is not smooth, and he can’t get from point A to point B without running headlong into a sliding glass door or being frightened by his beeper or spontaneously vomiting. (I promise you, this is all outrageously funny.)

You know what else I like? Goofy Bruce Willis. The Whole Nine Yards also features this very specialized kind of Bruce Willis, playing hit man Jimmy “The Tulip” Tudeski, for which he gets to be an ostensible badass, but really is a giant bag of quirks and outsized emotions. His facial reactions to Oz’s spazziness, and the way he likes to toy with Oz’s fears — getting a huge amount of enjoyment out of it in the process — it’s great fun to watch.

The Whole Nine Yards also has Playful Dork Amanda Peet — the BEST Amanda Peet — as Oz’s dental assistant (and would-be assassin, if he weren’t so charming — she’s looking to get into the contract killing business) Jill. She fangirls over Jimmy and Frankie Figs (Michael Clarke Duncan), uses her breasts as a distraction technique when killing people, and does a little snort laugh when she’s too overcome with joy to stop herself. This is the first movie Peet did when I really noticed her and liked her potential as a comedic actress, and comedy remains the genre I most enjoy her in. The Whole Nine Yards might be my favorite of all her roles to this day, even though I like a lot of other things she’s done. It’s just so much fun, and the chemistry and collaborations of all the actors fires on all levels.

I also love Kevin Pollack doing silly accents, and The Whole Nine Yards has that too, with him playing mob boss Janni Gogolak. Even better, The Whole Nine Yards knows how great this is, Kevin Pollack doing a silly accent, so it takes every opportunity to make fun of it. It even employs sexy, tall drink of water Natasha Henstridge as the smart, sly, witty straight man (or woman, in this instance), Cynthia Tudeski (Jimmy’s wife and the object of Oz’s affection) to mock the whole enterprise, just as cool as you please.

Throw in Rosanna Arquette as Oz’s horrible (that’s pronounced or-EE-bluh) French Canadian wife who keeps trying to kill him, and an incredibly funny crime caper story that takes full advantage of Oz’s seemingly innocuous profession without telegraphing its purpose from the outset, and there’s nothing I don’t like about The Whole Nine Yards. I am not ashamed.

MY MOVIE SHELF: Fools Rush In

The Task: Watch and write about every movie on my shelf, in order (Blu-rays are sorted after DVDs), by June 10, 2015.  Remaining movies: 264 Days to go: 259

Movie #113: Fools Rush In

There are definitely movies that I can acknowledge as not very good, objectively speaking, but I enjoy them anyway, and Fools Rush In is one of them. I happen to find Matthew Perry incredibly charming — especially his wry sarcastic bent — which I know is not everyone’s thing, but is totally mine. And this came out when Friends was still a huge force in television and pop culture (in fact, it was released the day after “The One Where Ross and Rachel Take a Break,” so, y’know), so I was at the height of my Matthew Perry admiration. (That’s an exaggeration. My admiration has never diminished.)

I also find Salma Hayek incredibly charming, but I don’t think I really have to justify that one, do I? I mean, she’s kind of perfect.

Fools Rush In is a fun little romantic comedy about a couple that meet, have an instant attraction and a one-night fling, but then three months later Isabel (Hayek) tracks down Alex (Perry) to let him know she’s pregnant. She wants nothing from him, but just thought he should know, though she does ask him to come with her to meet her family, posing as her boyfriend, so when she tells them about the baby they will at least know who the father was. However, due to their marvelous time and (allegedly) sizzling chemistry, they decide to get married. Hijinks ensue.

Now, I would neither support nor condone marrying someone you just met, even if you were knocked up, but in the grand scheme of things it’s really not all that big of a stretch for a romantic comedy. People in other movies have certainly declared their love under shakier circumstances. And what I really like, besides the two leads who, despite not necessarily sizzling on-screen as much as they’re purported to even though they do share a certain spark, is that the film actual deals with things like cultural and geographical issues that create obstacles in relationships. She is Mexican and Catholic, two things that deeply influence her character and lifestyle. He’s the kind of WASPy East-Coaster completely lacking in cultural or religious identifiers. And there are definitely clashes that come up because of that, but when they meet I kind of love that he just openly asks her about a discussion he overheard her having, without any sort of discomfort surrounding the idea of maybe bringing up taboo topics. He’s openly curious about her, and I find that refreshing.

There is also a bit of a trumped-up issue surrounding Alex’s job and his need to move back to NY for a big opportunity, but, again, what I like is that both Alex and Isabel make bad decisions with regard to their situation. They both withhold things and expect things that aren’t fair to the other person, so neither one of them is really solely at fault when things fall apart. And the reasons they act the way they do are also rooted in who they are as characters and what their backgrounds are, which is the most important facet of character-building, and that’s one thing I really think Fools Rush In does fairly well.

In the end, what I love most is how Alex is led back to Isabel by the metaphorical signs he encounters. Signs are a big part of Isabel’s identity, and something Alex has never quite embraced, but then he walks by a priest who says “There are signs everywhere,” and there’s a chihuahua that looks just like Isabel’s, and there’s a bus sign for Caesar’s (where Isabel works), and there’s a Kodak ad with a picture of the Grand Canyon (which is Isabel’s vocation), and there’s even a little Latina girl named Isabel that he comes across. And while signs aren’t usually that prolific or that obvious, I do believe in signs. I am neither Mexican nor Catholic — my ancestry and upbringing would put me far closer to Alex’s side of the spectrum — and religion in general is not something I embrace. But I do believe there are forces in the Universe greater than I am, greater than my understanding. And I have, from time to time, felt drawn in certain directions, toward certain opportunities and paths. It might be simply that your mind interprets things around you to lead you the way you were already subconsciously hoping to go, but I still find myself looking for direction when I’m feeling lost.

I also enjoy Jill Clayburgh (as Alex’s mom) getting drunk on margaritas for Cinco de Mayo. I’m not made of stone.

MY MOVIE SHELF: 17 Again

By rough estimate, I own 339 movies on DVD or Blu-ray, and it’s been a long time since I’ve watched a lot of them. Since I have a bit of time on my hands these days, I decided to take a few weeks to work my way through them all. Then my husband pointed out one movie a day would be nearly a year, so I revised my project. Between now and June 10, 2015, I will be watching and writing about each and every one of the movies I own, in the order they are arranged on my shelf (i.e., alphabetically, with certain exceptions). There will be no exceptions to this rule (even the most embarrassing, ridiculous titles are subject to scrutiny), other than that I will not be discussing any other discs I might own, such as TV series, sporting events, or live concerts as part of this endeavor. I welcome your comments, your words of encouragement and your declarations of my insanity.

Movie #3:  17 Again

As I warned in yesterday’s post, there will be a lot of movies appearing in this space that have to deal with changing one’s destiny, and in the span of two days, I’ve gone from one end of the spectrum to the other. Where 12 Monkeys is dystopian and fatalistic, 17 Again is wish-fulfillment fantasy.

In it, Matthew Perry stars as Mike O’Donnell, a former high school basketball star who sacrificed his chance at a college scholarship to marry his pregnant girlfriend, Scarlett. Intervening years and personal disappointment have left Mike bitter and resentful, and his marriage is breaking up as a result. It is at this point when he falls off a bridge into some sort of time-warp vortex and turns into his teenage self (Zac Efron). Thinking he’s taken this form again to finally give himself a shot at success, Mike returns to high school (posing as the son of his adult best friend, Ned, played delightfully by Thomas Lennon) but quickly realizes he’s been an absent father to his two children (Michelle Trachtenberg and Sterling Knight) as well as neglectful and unfair to his wife (the perfect Leslie Mann), and vows to make things better in their lives, as he should’ve been doing all along.

Now, I know Matthew Perry is not everyone’s cup of tea, but I actually like him a lot — always have, even when he was Carol Seaver’s boyfriend Sandy on Growing Pains — and think his sarcastic demeanor and acerbic comedic timing are perfect for the pre-transformation Mike. Efron, too, is witty and charming and emulates Perry’s speech patterns well. The whole movie, in fact, is legitimately funny throughout, as well as honestly touching and romantic — both in Mike’s story and in the fantastic B-plot courtship between Ned and high school principal Jane Masterson, played by Melora Hardin. The overarching themes are nothing new, having been explored in countless movies, from It’s a Wonderful Life to Peggy Sue Got Married to the little-seen Mr. Destiny and many, many more. But the performances and the script really sell this one, making an old concept feel fresh.

The reason I really like this film (or this type of film in general, actually), aside from the funny and the charm, is how optimistic and life-affirming it is. This is the kind of movie that makes you appreciate what you have and where you are, the one that makes you realize that whatever “mistakes” you may have made in the past, everything that’s happened has gotten you to where you are, so everything good in your life is indebted, at least in part, to the bad things as well. It’s the ultimate feel-good movie, really, not only because it validates so-called wrong-turns but because it also sends the message that it’s never too late to change, to do things differently, to make better choices.

I don’t know a single person who hasn’t felt sorrow or loss at a certain point in her life and wished she’d done things differently, and I think it’s important to constantly remind yourself — because we all forget from time to time — that we are the sum total of our experiences, that everything that exists today is a product of what has come before, and that regrets are lessons and opportunities to improve. That’s what this movie does for me.